Sunday, 18 September 2016

New Dom

So following an emotional time and s post on Fetlife, I began speaking to an online Dom, within days I was submitting to Him in ways I never have anyone else.

I realised that we have some seriously strong mental connection going on, like he was in my head. 

This week has been challenging to say the least....🙄

He pushes, he makes me face myself and what I want... And what I am afraid of 😔

I made a very bad mistake of telling him off for saying he loved me 😓

I didn't understand that someone who has never met me could do that, when people who I have loved and looked after for years struggled ... I was wrong ... Guess I am just lucky that he is online .... I think my ass would have been blistered for assuming I "knew" how he felt about that wonderful connection we have.

I realised I have done that with everyone pushed them away as soon as I feel anything for them or them for me 😔 I am truly sorry for that.

The word surrender kept coming up lots.... Until one night I broke.... I chose to trust him - it wasn't easy .... He knew shit about me he couldn't possibly have just "known" and I mean not just random shit either 

He is VERY strict, but so kind and fair too....

I am happy I am his 😘❤️

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